Well, today has been a bit of a struggle for me. Over the last year I have had way too many lost friendships. No matter how strong I appear to be, or even think I am, I find out that in a little corner of my heart I still miss my friends. Well, most of them! Hehehe! Seriously, though! I see names in my phone, I read cards, see gifts, and I never really know why they aren't there any more. Just knowing if I hadn't stood behind my pastor and his dreams and visions {that have become my family's dreams and visions} then I wouldn't have lost any friends. If I had to do it again....well...I would!!!! Number 1. Because I love my pastor and believe what he is preaching, and I believe in him and the path he is taking me and my family. Number 2. Because my friendships shouldn't control my life and what I believe. I realize other people have different beliefs and I respect that! I always say "The world would be a VERY boring place if everyone were the same." I just don't get why nobody can talk to me because I don't do things the same as them, and if that isn't the reason then why can't I at least get an explanation? Life is so difficult sometimes. It's so easy just to go with the "in" crowd and try your best to be like them and be accepted by them then to stand up for what you believe and get thrown under the bus, ran over, and then they back up and run over you again. It's also difficult when you have dreams that you and your friends have dreamed that included them that is destroyed just because they think I have to be like them. It's not my place to judge, so why should I be judged? People hang out with friends in their public school's and college everyday and they don't throw them to the side of the road and say, "I can't talk to you or love you because you don't go to my church or believe what I believe." No, you show them love so they can see Christ through you, right?! Well, if they don't show them much love and respect then they must not have any friends! Hahahah! Anyhow, I said all of this to say, I still love and respect my friends oh, so very much I just wish I had answers.
I know a couple of my blogging friends may still read my blog...so if you are I want you to know that I love you so very much! I'm trying to get over the confusion that is in my mind. I know nobody is perfect and maybe you didn't have an option and you had to leave me stranded on the side of the road, if you would like to explain it you have my number, email and address! :o)
Peace, Love & Chocolate!!!!
